Saturday, August 20, 2005

Not Just Eye Candy

Thank you all for your encouraging comments. I make thousands of these images & select the one that comes closest to saying what I long to say yet cannot articulate in words--but more often than not I spend hours, sometimes days tweaking the heck out of just one fractal alone to get it to say what I ache so bad to express.

To me these aren't just eye candy; they convey very specific thoughts, emotions. I have some brain damage that often limits my ability to articulate in words, to make my fingers sketch what I see (and oh what I see, how I wish I could show the world!) I post these images “casually” yet there is nothing “casual” about them at all. These pieces are far more than “eye candy” to me. They are the deepest cries of my soul—every ache and every joy. I am a very intense, very passionate person. Limitations of articulation are a great source of frustration for me because my imagination and thoughts are not so limited!

I have good days and bad days. A bad day is when I cannot find words to express what I am thinking or when I lose a little more memory. I think my subconscious takes over somewhere in art because sometimes people looking at them “hear me”, sometimes they even see depths in them that I didn’t realize were exposed & that thrills the heck out of me. My other blog is a sort of tormented struggle because the form of expression in it is through words.

Working with chaos art means controlling random (or rather attempting to) to create effects that convey these thoughts & feelings. Like any form of art some people are completely unmoved but it is awesome when someone looks at these and a feeling is stirred up in them! Even if it wasn't the feeling I was trying to convey! I am thrilled when someone tells me how they felt or how they interpret what I made. Sometimes I think of not naming them at all so as not to prejudice the interpretation.

I have an almost anguished desire to convey something of what I think or feel. At the same time I am also very interested in the feelings evoked by them, the interpretations of these images by whoever views them. If something is stirred inside of you from what I have created--it is a success! It moved you. I hope people will share their impressions in the comment section. Each interpretation would be absolutely unique to the individual, therefore possibly radically different. How exciting that is!

7 comments:

Trée said...

Oliviah, this post is as moving as anything I have read in some time. To see into the soul of another is such a rare thing since the windows to that soul are often barricaded shut. Your images are so beautiful and thought provoking I linked your site several weeks ago.

Thanks for being you and adding a small amount of joy to my life. I may need to again remind my visitors to come pay you a visit. Hugs and kisses. :-)

Oliviah said...

You have such a good heart, thank you...

TotalChaos said...

Oliviah, I know exactly what you are saying. Since I can't get out and about, like I used to, John, listed on my blog, introduced me to fractals. As you say, some are not moved by this type of work, some think it is just push-pull-click click and it is done. I take medicines for mental problems, and each of my works, is an outreach, that maybe some one will understand or get a laugh or smile from. I try to name each one, some are readily dicernable, others take insight, that some don't have.
Keep up the great work.

Day Dreamer said...

Even as I type, I'm finding words difficult to convey what I feel. That's why I write poetry, prose, a few lines of what I'm thinking, somethink that makes me delve deeper into expression. What I write, however, isn't what I want the reader to read, per se; I want them to experience and feel because the words moved them. The words are a transport vessel to their feelings. I'm positive your images do they same. After all, anything we create is nothing until it moves someone, even if that someone is us. If it affects someone else, that's a bonus.

jane said...

your work is amazing! ihope you don't mind, but i'm going to put your link up on my site.

imaginecity said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
imaginecity said...

Oliviah

I can't convey how your art moves me, and how good you are at moving the humman spirit, it's a gift, some of us do not have, and a voice some of us will never have...

how are they done, computers? your world is surely an incredibly vast and a deep space, i wish to enter it..i've bookmarked this blog for my friends to see..