Thursday, September 08, 2005


Delicately fragile...yes, that is me. I wondered should I put on a false front, find an image that depicts a cheery strong facade and not something that is an image of vulnerability? Don't we all want to look good & strong in the face of difficulties, brave & cheerful despite any odds? Ever stable. appearing at peace? Projecting those vibes that will draw respect and approval, acceptance? I confess that I looked, I tried to create an image tonight that would show all these wonderful traits...but they just were not real. This image is real. The fragility, the vulnerability, the pain of the pieces of my life seeming to fly away as I am helpless to catch them, swirling helplessly in this dance of confusion and pain. I made the choice to be real. This blog is me, not mere images & I will keep it that way, even if no one wishes to view it again. I would rather be real than just one more lie in this world. Not just for my own personal integrity, though that is a major issue of importance to me. But also, because I do not know what I will remember even days or weeks from now...I must be real so that when I look back at this I can know who I really was...not just some persona. This image I posted today is delicate, it is raw exposure of what is happening to me. Perhaps tomorrow will bring some strength. If that is so, that is what you will see. I will be real---so avert your eyes if you must. We will all see something different in these images. I hope you see something beautiful inside of you, regardless of what I post of me... Posted by Picasa

11 comments:

TotalChaos said...

Olivia, the outside of the image is fragile like sandstone, and the inner part looks soft, but, the inner part has more places to connect to. The more the connctions, the stronger the core becomes. It is there, the core, that matters. Just my take on your image.

Day Dreamer said...

The images, the words, the thoughts, all of these expressions are real. We all speak, to the masses or to no one in general with our works. We all have our reasons why we post what we do. You speak to all with your images, inviting us to share in the beauty you created. But, more importantly, you speak to yourself. What an incredible insight you posses to have left bookmarks for yourself, points of interest to reflect on. Your inner strength and determination evident in your posts.

Be real.

Trée said...

To see what is, that is all.

jane said...

you said, "The fragility, the vulnerability, the pain of the pieces of my life seeming to fly away as I am helpless to catch them, swirling helplessly in this dance of confusion and pain."
When I read this & looked at the picture again, it was as though my feet under me were giving way. You know how your knees buckle? That was HEAVY!

Oliviah said...

I felt inside of myself a bit of stabilizing in what all of you said. The power of words never cease to amaze me. daddyjarbucks, your take on the image, that helped me. I wish I had better words to say this to you all but I don't so I will just say, thank you.

On day dreamer's blog he has these quotes on poetry (which apply to all art, I think):

"You will not find poetry anywhere unless you bring some of it with you" - Joseph Joubert -

"A poem should not mean/But be" - Archibald MacLeish -

I enjoy all of your blogs so much, I suppose for the reasons in those quotes.

littlepage said...

I just stumbled upon your blog, and am simply astonished. There is so much beauty and love and heart-wrenching pain here, joy and clarity and fear. It really touches on the sheer diversity of individual lived experience, on the many ways of being-in-the-world that we each traverse in our daily lives. Thank you.

Universal Soldier said...

A beautiful site - thank you.

TotalChaos said...

Olivia, I, most of the time can only use my fractals to speak for me. I keep coming back to this work, because I need to tell you something else that I feel about this, Untitled Work. The parts that are spinning away from the Core, are your fractals, that you put up here. I have trouble trying to express in words what is in my brain, and have it come out right on the keyboard.Hopefully you will see my context and understand what I mean.

Oliviah said...

I understand, because I can relate to that difficulty. Your first comment was very insightful and I found it soothing and bracing. What you just posted added another element to what you already said; I appreciate your comments.

Oliviah said...

littlepage, welcome and thank you...I was quite moved by what you and jane said, I haven't adequate words to express how your words touched me. I wish that I did.

Jojee said...

Brandon says:

I see a snail.